Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

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I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Why cant I feel anything in my sleep? I cannot even feel myself moving, breathing, and swallowing saliva! I cannot even hear anything, not even my alarm! Some people that I've been with says that I'm moving a lot in my sleep, how can I stop it?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Im not transphobic/homophobic but, am I in the wrong for being uncomfortable when a trans person comes into the lockeroom? I just dont want them to stare at me while Im changing.

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I have complete contempt for fakery

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Do Republicans want to ban books and decide what your kids can and can’t read?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Just sitting at home with this huge cock. Who can take care of it for me?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

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I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

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I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

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I don’t buy bullshit

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I actually pay taxes

As a guy, how do you know you if you are considered attractive?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

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I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

What would it take for you to consider yourself a "Swiftie" like Flavor Flav?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I can read

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

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I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

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I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I see through liars

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have a reading level above third grade

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I can count

I understand how hurricane paths work